Thursday, June 16, 2005

Are cyber-relationships healthy?

In "The Man with Two Brains" Steve Martin spends the entire film talking to a brain in a jar. They sing together, indulge in conversations, he even slaps a pair of lips onto the jar and kisses them. Not too healthy you might say.

Chatting to someone in the blogosphere, conversing through IM, even using the old-fashioned e-mail method is not the healthiest way to relate to someone. We do strip down the old labels of fashion, weight and looks, but we build the Other person up in our own fantasy, buxom blondes, strapping construction workers etc. Ignore the fact that the so-called hottie might be a 42 yr old hairy fat man called Gerald and the handsome successful Manhattan entrepenuer is in fact a 68 yr old janitor in the Midwest.

Does it cause more damage than good to get too close to someone in cyberland? Does the blogworld lead to good, healthy sustainable friendships/relationships or merely a bunch of frustrated lonely people living out their fantasies vicariously in their offices and bedrooms across the globe?

TRK

9 Comments:

At 6/16/2005 4:02 AM, Blogger Storm Trooper said...

Meh. I enjoy blogging but realize that the people I meet are probably just normal people - or not who they say they are. Of course it causes damage to society. What are we going to do about it? Besides - America's going to take over the world soon and nothing will matter anyway...

 
At 6/16/2005 6:40 AM, Blogger tmeishar said...

If you're worried about fakes, I should warn you that I doubt that this superman character looks like his picture.

 
At 6/16/2005 8:46 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does he look gay? He sure is...

 
At 6/16/2005 10:01 AM, Blogger TwennyTwo said...

I, for one, have tried the whole internet match thing, but always introduce reality into things rather early. (And it never works anyway.)

I think it's fine to get close to someone online as long as you haven't isolated yourself from other options- the ones you get when you turn off your monitor and go get some air. Also, for me, anyway, I tend to argue and really get into things online... in that kinda forum, people's true characters come through. There's something to be argued for in that. Instead of being caught up in the 'cuteness' or ideal body/face of the person you're talking to, you can really get into how they are. Bodies go away. Thoughts seldom do.

But then, being a girl I tend to focus on the inside anyway.

peace
Twennytwo

 
At 6/16/2005 2:33 PM, Blogger 2R said...

healthy relationships? Does more damage then good? Too close? It is never a good idea to get emotionally involved with someone who you don't know. Yes, online flirting can lead to pain. But so can real world flirting.

 
At 6/16/2005 2:34 PM, Blogger ClooJew said...

I don't know anyone, lulei demistafina, who has replaced "real" relationships with online ones. Online allows you to meet and share ideas with ppl you would not otherwise meet.

 
At 6/16/2005 4:51 PM, Blogger Margaritagirrl said...

I think that if you want to blog, or go online in any other forum, you've got to take it with a grain (or pound) of salt. Just have fun with it - certainly don't believe everything! Some may be telling the truth, others may be portraying themselves 100 per cent different than they are in reality. If you understand this, and don't have false hope, it can be fun, good for the ego, develops your writing skills, find out about people and their different environments, etc.
But, PLEASE - don't expect anything more - if it DOES happen - hey - that's a bonus!!

 
At 6/16/2005 8:26 PM, Blogger Duude said...

Furthering clooljew's comment,

I've had online "relationships" that led to real-life ones, and they were just as good, if not better...

From the guy's perspective for sure, even if we're not shallow and as much as u'll say looks are secondary, u will always look at a person, and judge them by there looks, online (before the picture of course) you get to know the person, without looks coming into the picture, intelligence counts for alot, and you really appreciate them for what they are, then if you see you're constantly talking to them, it'll automatically go to the next level...

Duude

 
At 6/16/2005 9:43 PM, Anonymous HashkaficallyLost said...

Internet relationships are bad precisely because people are more open online than in real life. Some may claim that it give the people more of a chance to get to know each other, but when those people actually meet face to face, its quite awkward, as suddenly the whole style of the relationship changes.

 

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