Tuesday, September 27, 2005

To my Ex

Dearest Ex,

I want you to realize why we could never have worked and why I was forced to tell you that you were holding me back. Look at me then and look at me now. When I was with you, my spiritual life was a mess. I wasn't growing or improving, I was stagnant.

Check out your other boyfriends since me. Regular guys, maybe keep shabbat maybe not. Nothing too special about them, they aren't gonna try and change the world, no great ambitions, normal people. They're probably never going to inspire anyone to live a Jewish life.

I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it. Making Torah a part of my life again, exploring avenues to become a better more knowledgeable Yid, maybe even make a difference to other people. You would not be the right one to join me on the road, hand in hand the entire way. In fact, you held me back from that path.

I couldn't allow myself to settle where I was and be happy with my unadvanced state. I always believed that I was destined for better things and I still hope I am. I must aim high, because I only got one shot.

You did not contain the requisite Oooomph to stick by me and journey with me through this incredible thing called life searching for an ever-elusive G-d. I hope one day to find that girl who can do that with me, but you were not The One. Sorry.

Eternally not yours,

TRK

15 Comments:

At 9/27/2005 8:48 AM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

ouch!

 
At 9/27/2005 9:02 AM, Blogger Littleredridinghoodie said...

Nice, I always go with a more PC approach...

You will thank me later for letting you go
Its not you it's me
Maybe i have ADD
I know it hurts you now but soon you will see
I am doing you a favor
By setting you free
Think of it as a gift
So go and be
I care so much
I am saving you from me
If I could I would do the same for myself
But I can't I am in too deep
Only you are lucky
So go out and be happy
I am not leaving you
I am freeing you
Appreciate this precious gift
Because freedom is my most prized posession.

 
At 9/27/2005 12:23 PM, Blogger Jameel @ The Muqata said...

brutal.

 
At 9/27/2005 12:35 PM, Blogger yingele said...

chazak veematz brother!

 
At 9/27/2005 1:28 PM, Blogger The Rabbi's Kid said...

mh, the truth must be told.

lrh, I prefer the "it's not me it's you" line. Nice poem though.

Jammel, gotta be cruel to be kind.

Yingster, thanks bro. PGBY and all that - just dump their sorry ass if they don't cut it.

 
At 9/27/2005 1:41 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

trk - so let me get this straight...she forced you to go out with her (for a prolonged period of time), forced you to abandon morals and goals, hypnotized you into staying with her despite her lack of ooomph, and now date the (much maligned) "regular guys". wow - must be a very powerful woman. i certainly hope you achieve your lofty aspirations (i agree that you have the potential to do so) - but we musn't step on the "little people" along the path and should make sure to take responsibility for our own actions. in my humble opinion. (no offense intended)

 
At 9/28/2005 6:21 AM, Blogger Karl said...

Slightly harsh, and I'm with hoodie, but doesnt mean I havent felt like that before. No need for the second paragraph. No one is 'regular', especially when refering to someones other half.
You need to find someone on the same path in life, heading in the same direction and general pace. She is out there for you.

 
At 9/28/2005 7:47 AM, Anonymous DW said...

Which ex are you talking to, TRK? One of the girls you mentioned in a previous post? Or is it the "mythological" girl as they say in Hebrew?

 
At 9/28/2005 9:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hmmn- this was all about YOU but still managed to be critical of her. You have to reach personal heights as well of those spiritual ones - and think yourself into understanding the mind of your potential partner - rather than analysing relationship in terms of ME ME ME

 
At 9/28/2005 2:16 PM, Blogger Lo said...

I would have to agree with the SCARY amount of narcissism implied in this post.

 
At 9/28/2005 5:46 PM, Anonymous Safiyyah said...

Scarily arrogant! Not very appealing to any woman possibly considering you at this point.

 
At 9/29/2005 2:31 AM, Blogger tafka PP said...

The question is, is she ever likely to read this?

 
At 9/29/2005 1:23 PM, Blogger The Rabbi's Kid said...

ok people, thanks for the biting comments, that's what i need. truth be told, this ex is a semi-fictional agent provocateur to demonstrate what i am looking for.

otherwise, most of your comments are justified.

 
At 9/29/2005 6:08 PM, Anonymous Safiyyah said...

Perhaps sometime you'll explain to me, TRK, the reason for our falling-out. I have a lot of Jewish friends - several of them Orthodox - and despite our disagreements, we still have a great deal of respect for each other.

 
At 9/29/2005 8:19 PM, Blogger The Rabbi's Kid said...

Safiyyah, don't reveal our spat in public, they can't know about our tiff! Seriously though, to what do you refer?

 

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