Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Guys, have no fear, use your claws

Gentlemen,

I don't want to give too much of the game away and then have to compete with you in the big jungle of life, but I thought I'd pass on a few words of wisdom from some of the Gedolim of the last generation (censored for publication) and leave you to draw your own conclusions. They pass on the message far better than I ever could (or would wish to).

"You know what you are? You're like a big bear with claws and with fangs... And she's just like this little bunny, who's just kinda cowering in the corner ... you know, you got these claws and you're staring at these claws and your thinking to yourself, and with these claws you're thinking, "How am I supposed to kill this bunny, how am I supposed to kill this bunny?" You're just kinda gently batting the bunny around, you know what I mean? And the bunny's scared Mike, the bunny's scared of you, shivering. And you got these claws and these fangs, man! And you're looking at your claws and you're looking at your fangs. And you're thinking to yourself, you don't know what to do, man. "I don't know how to kill the bunny." With *this* you don't know how to kill the bunny, do you know what I mean?

You're so money and you don't even know it!

I don't want you to be the guy in the PG-13 movie everyone's *really* hoping makes it happen. I want you to be like the guy in the rated R movie, you know, the guy you're not sure whether or not you like yet. You're not sure where he's coming from. Okay? You're a bad man. You're a bad man, Mikey. You're a bad man, bad man.

You take yourself out of the game, you start talking about puppy dogs and ice cream and of course it's going to end up on the friendship tip.

Oh Mikey do you think I even know what the hell they are talking about half the time? I don't know whether they are talking about how hard it is to be adopted or how their father never shows them love. All I do man, is I wrinkle my eyebrows, stare at their lips and somehow I turn out to be some big sweetie.

Oh, Mike, respect my ass. What they respect is honesty. Look you see how they dress when they go out. Right? They want you to notice 'em. Now all your doing is letting them know it's working. You got to get off of this respect thing. There's nothing wrong with letting the girls know that your money and that you want to party."

Trust me, these giants knew what they were saying, it is up to us to listen and learn from their ways.

TRK

29 Comments:

At 12/20/2005 5:01 PM, Blogger Eshet Chayil said...

I don't get this post...

 
At 12/20/2005 5:12 PM, Blogger Karl said...

Cocktails first. Questions later.

 
At 12/20/2005 5:30 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

eshet chayil - use google

 
At 12/20/2005 6:12 PM, Blogger Masmida said...

I'm with EC

don't get it and what I get I don't like.

 
At 12/20/2005 6:32 PM, Blogger Elster said...

Totally overrated movie.

 
At 12/20/2005 6:32 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

I agree

 
At 12/20/2005 6:33 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

I meant i agree with masmida

 
At 12/20/2005 8:40 PM, Blogger FrumGirl said...

LOL... TRK you are one twisted guy! Keep them coming this is like a joyride.

 
At 12/21/2005 7:33 AM, Blogger Littleredridinghoodie said...

Good bye TRK.

 
At 12/21/2005 8:00 AM, Blogger Joe said...

I think my thoughts echo the comments above.

 
At 12/21/2005 2:23 PM, Anonymous Confused said...

"Continuing with my theme of powerful forces,"

Does this post continue your theme?

 
At 12/21/2005 2:27 PM, Anonymous Jay said...

You are no bear with claws, you are a sick puppy...

Kill the bunny? Sounds more like you are the rabbit looking for a little action...

What happened to Oz vehadar?

 
At 12/21/2005 2:40 PM, Blogger Littleredridinghoodie said...

TRK,
I guess we will just have to wait and see how things turn out with Jen Jen... ;)

What I meant was, bye for now, my DSL (internet) is down and the free dial up I have been bumming off of ends today. :(

Shabbat Shalom

 
At 12/21/2005 8:25 PM, Blogger Moiy-rah said...

dunno everyone, i actually really liked this post. good luck to everyone :)

 
At 12/21/2005 9:03 PM, Blogger Eshet Chayil said...

I'm seriously curious. What is this post about?

 
At 12/22/2005 4:43 AM, Blogger Jameel @ The Muqata said...

If the air in Eretz Yisrael is supposed to make me "smarter", it isn't working. I re-read your post twice and feel rather clueless.

Your posting went right over my head.

I'll still check back next week anyway.

Shabbat Shalom!

 
At 12/22/2005 8:45 AM, Blogger Elster said...

TRK - your posters are too frum for this post. Alas

 
At 12/22/2005 10:55 AM, Blogger Karl said...

If u don't know whats going on, follow MH - just google it.

 
At 12/22/2005 4:18 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

trk - what are you trying to prove - that guys are jerks?
why don't you start giving tips to wife and child abusers as well?

elster - i don't think this has anything to do with being "frum". this is a matter of being decent. unless i've totally misunderstood the post.

 
At 12/22/2005 9:50 PM, Blogger brianna said...

Sure, they want attention. And some of them are goldiggers. But if you are a nice guy you won't take advantage of a woman's low self esteem. On the other hand, why shouldn't you?

 
At 12/23/2005 4:47 AM, Blogger The Rabbi's Kid said...

It's nice to see when my words are not fully understood, like the sages of yore, they are couched in metaphor, allegory and imagery. Only the wise can fully plumb the depths of my meaning. The prols can wallow in the dark, dank ignorance of their existence.

If I'm feeling generous I will post a clarification and explanation. Till then, enjoy grasping at the threads of my meaning.

TRK

 
At 12/23/2005 6:46 AM, Blogger Elster said...

mata - What I meant was that these are simnply movie quotes. And I would venture to say that a majority of TRK's viewership don't watch movies.

As for the "meaning" of the post - I not offering an opinion - except to say that TRK does better when he's bein original

 
At 12/23/2005 7:43 AM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

elster - gotcha. although i'd guess that most of the posters do watch movies - but perhaps haven't seen swingers. shall we take a poll? i go to movies. that's one.

 
At 12/23/2005 9:01 AM, Blogger Elster said...

me too - AND I've seen swingers. AND as I mentioned above, it was overrated. AND this remains one of trk's lesser workds.

 
At 12/23/2005 12:13 PM, Blogger Eshet Chayil said...

What's swingers?

 
At 12/23/2005 12:42 PM, Blogger Mata Hari said...

eshet chayil - the movie all the quotes are from.

 
At 12/24/2005 4:24 PM, Anonymous Brooklyn Bochur said...

I think what TRK is trying to say is that it is ok to be a sexy gent, and taking the first step, making the first move, planting the first kiss, just puts him in his traditional role of MAAAN! Not pussy...

 
At 12/24/2005 6:01 PM, Anonymous Brooklyn Bochur said...

Make love like a man
I’m a man
That’s what I am

All you girls ’round the world
Lookin’ for a guy who’s a real go getter, yeah
Every guy grab a girl
Love her like a man, make her feel a lot better, yeah
Everybody

You want it, I’m the one
I got it, I’m mr. fun
You need it, I’m captain cool, yeah
Come get it, and I’ve come for you
Come on

Don’t call me gigolo, don’t call me casanova
Just call me on the phone and baby come on over
When you need someone
When you need someone to...

Make love like a man
I’m a man
That’s what I am, yeah
Make love like a man
Your kinda man
That’s what I am

Every day, every night
Take her little heart ’til it beats like a hammer, yeah, oh
Come on, do it good, do it right
Crazy little girl gonna stutter’n’stammer, stammer

Don’t call me gigolo, don’t call me casanova
Just call me on the phone and baby come on over
When you need someone
When you need someone to...

Make love like a man
I’m a man
That’s what I am, yeah
Make love like a man
Your kinda man
That’s what I am

Gimme some rock’n’roll
Little bit of rock’n’roll
It’s gotta be rock’n’roll
Little bit of rock’n’roll

A little bit of love goes a long, long way
Gotta get it on if you really wanna get her
Never ever wait it’s a little to late
Love her like a man, make her feel a lot better

You want it, yeah, baby
I got it, why not
You need it, oh, oh
Come get it, oh, come on

Don’t call me gigolo, don’t call me casanova
Just call me on the phone and baby come on over
When you need someone, when you need someone
When you need someone to...

Make love like a man
I’m a man
That’s what I am, yeah
Make love like a man
Your kinda man
That’s what I am

Make love, make love, like a man, like a man
I’m a man, I’m a man, that’s what I am baby
Make love, make love, like a man, like a man
I’m a man, I’m a man, that’s what I am
Hey, get it while you can, make love
I wanna be your man, like a man
Baby understand, I’m a man
I’m a m-m-m-man
Make love, make love, like a man, like a man
Your kinda man
Oh, you love her like a man
She’s gonna feel a lot better
And that’s a fact

 
At 12/24/2005 6:03 PM, Anonymous Brooklyn Bochur said...

for all u frummies it's Def Leppard...

 

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