Saturday, August 13, 2005

Newsflash: Jewish Temple burning

We've just received a report that the war in Jerusalem has reached new levels. Over to our reporter who is on the scene:

Yes, thank you. I'm here now overlooking the city of Jerusalem and as you can see behind me the Romans have succeeded in breaking into the Jewish Temple, their most holy place and set it alight. The flames have spread through most of the Temple mount, not before the invading army plundered the area of it's holy artifacts.

I have here the Roman army spokeman. What can you tell me about today's events?
We warned those pesky vermin that if they didn't give in to us, surrender peacefully and dismantle their anti-Roman centers of worship we would have to forcibly destroy their Temple, and we've proven that nobody can stop the might of the Roman Empire.

I also have with me a member of the hard-line Biryoni clan - what is your reaction to today's incredible events?
We will never surrender to the Roman invaders. Our mission is to fight back, to respond with any force we can, down to the last remaining fighter. We shall not give up.

And you over here from the Ben Zaccai faction, what do you say?
We believe is it time to move on and rebuild Jewish life outside Jerusalem, we are planning to convene soon in Yavneh to redefine the concept of Jewish prayer and to ensure that the Jewish religion survives these times of upheaval.

Well, that's all from me here in Jerusalem, over to you back at the studio.

Thank you for that report. In other news, Nero has just bought his first fiddle .....

TRK

6 Comments:

At 8/14/2005 3:38 AM, Blogger Olah Chadasha said...

Today on Oprah: "Nero makes up with his mother. Stay tuned to see their tear jerking reunion. Take a look..."
-OC

 
At 8/14/2005 7:12 AM, Blogger Armoth said...

Just asking, what was the purpose of that?

 
At 8/14/2005 1:00 PM, Blogger Olah Chadasha said...

Purpose of what?

 
At 8/14/2005 3:24 PM, Blogger Karl said...

Sad thing is, nowadays its just, 'here we go again, same old story, Jews get attacked/ thrown out of land, its all there fault, now back to the studio for something new.'

 
At 8/15/2005 9:32 AM, Blogger CJ Srullowitz said...

With the disengagement today, there is a possibility, Rachmana litzlan, of Jews shooting at other Jews.

I think it's important that everyone, regardless of your position, take a moment today and over the next few days to say one chapter of Psalms to beg the Good L-rd not to allow any bloodshed.

 
At 8/16/2005 4:44 AM, Blogger Olah Chadasha said...

Actually, there's really a nill possibility of Jews shooting other Jews. There's no weapons allowed in the settlements, and we've seen so far, there's been far more tears, hugging, and talking than any kind of violence. Don't doubt the Jews. When push comes to shove, we know how to treat eachother right.
-OC

 

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